B-O-R-I-N-G

Boring post tonight.... So just to pre-warn y'all I made a commitment to myself to blog everyday this month. I have not failed, though I am beginning to realize why blogging every day is not so easy. It is difficult to call upon that sarcastic wit at a moments notice. I am however nothing if not committed.

So today was:

• making father's day cards with the kids
• washing dishes
• applying for jobs in the bay area 1) to fulfill my NMdeptoflabor requirements and 2) because i am going to need a job.
• drinking dos quis cerveza with salt and lime (the key to the whole day really)
• referee, slave, housekeeper, confidant aka...mom

I warned you that it was boring but you insisted on being one of my few lurkers and reading anyway.

PLGC & a SHOUT OUT to my lurkers, -i love you guys

We temporarily interrupt this mommy blog...

We temporarily interrupt this mommy blog for a brief moment of sanity vs. insanity.

So i have been pushing beyond a lot of boundaries lately; Personal, business, art, mommy-hood.

On the personal front: i find myself pushing who I AM. Am I the witness as Ken Wilbur suggests? i think, yes. I observe my daily surroundings but I am not my daily surroundings. I do not live in the Cartesian Dualism that Wilbur purports in his anthology "The Simple Feeling of Being". I am, I AM the witness. I step inside and outside of the dual, the opposite, this IS. My spirituality bounds beyond those celebrated this last Sunday. My spirituality does not exist.

On the business front: my superiors throw quixotic equations that momentarily float above the realm of my brain. i snap, grasp, calculate and breathe a sigh of relief that i can actually sum up the anathema. (thank you CS)

On the art front: i am pissed the FUCK off that I have been in a dentist's office for more days than necessary to deal with a root canal among the other umpteen million things they want to do to my mouth! What has that to do with art you ask? Every, Fucking, Thing. If I am not making my art then I may as well not breathe. Thank goodness that i am being the great I AM as stated above or this Shit would totally knock me off my rocker.

On the mommy front: i love my kids, DID YOU GET THAT? i LOVE 'em!! they are completely obnoxious, utterly adorable, totally interrupt the focus that i try to achieve on a daily basis and (ignoring the serial comma here) love them! Each day proves to me more and more that i need to be who I AM to help them be who they are.

So if you think I am completely nuts, don't write me off just yet. it is simply the creative genius of my right brain cataloging what you and I already know to be true. WOW, you really can compose everything out of nothing, and so on (serial comma included).

PLGC to you all, EVOLVE DAMMIT!

Mamacita says...

Mamacita Caliente says: "Better to be a bad mommy blogger than a bad mommy."

Ok so it has been a while since I have set anything down on these pages. Where do I start? Well BG loves school, her exact words "mom, school is fun but we don't really learn stuff we just get to play, and thats okay don't you think?" Uhm, yeah I do think!

I had my first parent teacher conference yesterday and am pleased to report that BG has only 2 outstanding issues; 1. She doesn't clean up when it is time (honestly can't say I was surprised by this one), she likes to dance to the clean up song and ignore her teacher, hmmm, 2. She really spends a lot of time washing her hands. Well I am not putting her into therapy just yet, though we may have to keep an eye on that hand-washing thing!

We have a saying around our house "if it isn't crazy and chaotic then it wouldn't be our life." Well we have been trying to hold up our end of that bargain. I have been ecstatic to be a stay at home mom again, well minus the screaming fits that my two year old has perfected (but only when I am on the phone, in public, or trying to think through a blog). It has taken me just shy of three months to adjust to this stay at home role. So what do I go and do? I am going back to work.

The company that so graciously laid me off three months ago came back with a job offer. I know you all probably think I am a glutton for punishment, but they made an offer I couldn't refuse on an account that has a contract guaranteed for the next 6 months. They are going to work with my schedule let me take BG to school and I get off in time to pick her up. Here is the point where I take back anything I ever said about my Mom, and kiss her feet for agreeing to watch my little "angels" for a few hours each day.

I feel like a Rat's ass. Yup, I know that going back to work, at least as far as my pocket book, bill collectors, and the upcoming holiday's go, is a good idea. I just feel like I am failing somehow. Maybe not so much failing as kicking myself for not appreciating the last three month's more. Gack! Here's is the part where my diatribe turns to mush and I start crying and carrying on. Hey I feel better already.

I am up and down but determined to enjoy the ride. As my M-I-L likes to put it "kids are resilient little stinkers" so I know they'll be fine. Mommy on the other hand, well y'all know I'll be a basket case. It will be interesting being a two income family, we'll have to make sure and appreciate the down time, and I sure as hell won't be the only one doing the dishes! PLGC -out