"R" rated post due to Strong Adult language

Kids are such a trip. Do you ever wake up in a panic in the middle of the night. Not just any old panic, but the kind of panic that makes your heart palipitate erratically with one thought surging through your brain...SHIT SHIT SHIT i have tiny little human beings, shit i have a toddler and an infant, SHIT how the FUCK did this happen to me. You know, that kind of panic. Who are these little beings that can manipulate my emotions on a dime? BG just pushed me over the edge today, especially when she woke up Bebe Boy, whom I had just gotten to sleep. My actions were not befitting the mom I consider myself to be. I guess i should confess to y'all the conditions in which we live. I'll preface by saying i HATE your privelidge, hate it. My house is a 1 bedroom, it's very small, we rent. 3 cats, 1 giant ass dog [whom we've owned 8-9 years consecutively] 2 kids, 2 adults, VERY FUCKING SMALL! We aren't degenerates, we just went into business with family. Suffice to say 3 years no vacations, no insurance, and pretty fucking sick of it. Wow, i think this shall be the R rated post, sorry, there is just a lot of frustration "in da house". Suffice to say hot daddy is on the job hunt, and hot mommy is seriously post partum. Okay so i am just going to cut it off here, i really don't like sharing this much personal info, it freaks me the fuck out.